"And I looked, and behold a pale horse: and his name that sat on him was Goo, and Goblins followed with him."
When looking to sell your home in this competitive housing market it is extremely important to choose a realty company that will go that extra mile for you. Well look no further because we at Max21 Realty are just that kind of company. You see, not only will Max21 place a For Sale sign on your front lawn, we will also provide you with a well dressed gentleman to hold up that sign. And that’s not all. In addition to holding up the sign, that very same well dressed gentleman will do funny little dances in your front yard in an attempt to attract more attention to your home. He will also carry a very loud whistle, which he will blow incessantly at all hours in between shouts of “House, house man, get your house here!” In addition, upon request, the agent will also be happy to taunt your neighbors for no additional charge. But wait, there’s more. Just in case your house isn’t selling through these conventional means, each of our “yard agents” are also provided with a big bag of sharp rocks to throw at passers by, because unlike many other realty companies, we at Max21 are not above physically assaulting people in order to coerce them into buying your home. And that, my friend, is called going the extra mile.
"Whatever doesn’t kill you makes you stronger."
- a phrase of little consolation when you’ve just had your ass
handed to you in the school yard at recess
by the smallest girl in the entire 3rd Grade
(not that I would know)
"Fill the unforgiving minute with sixty seconds worth of distance run. Fill the regular minute with sixty seconds worth of lounging on the couch drinking beer."
- Rudyard Kipling
They say you can’t have your cake and eat it too. Unfortunately, I found out the hard way that the same rule applies to your cookies.
Whenever somebody accuses me of being “all talk and no action,” I have to remind them that talking, in itself, is a form of action and for that matter, so is curling up in a fetal position at the first sign of trouble.
Here's one we'll call naked alien practicing the karate. Apparently he's a black belt, but clearly his form leaves something to be desired. Quite frankly, Mr. Miyagi would be appalled. Neither "wax on wax off" nor "paint the fence". If anything, it looks more like a weak attempt at "pour the juice". What an absolute disgrace. Just another example of a know it all spaceman who can't be bothered to put forth even the slightest bit of effort.
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