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The Claw?

Here we see Pakistani President Pervez Musharraf doing that famed "Claw" routine with his left hand. It's something he does at press conferences in order to side step the tough questions. That's right. Whenever he gets hit with a difficult inquiry the "Claw" immediately comes to life. He claims it has a mind of its own. First it starts grabbing at the air in the direction of the person who asked the question and then, inevitably, the "Claw" turns on Musharraf himself. It clutches onto his face, causing him to flail around screaming "Ahhhh, the Claw has got me. It's tearing out my eyes!" Of course, it usually only takes him a short time to pry the "Claw" away using his right hand, but then there's always that period of several uncomfortable minutes during which the "Claw" has to be physically restrained and occasionally breaks free and starts toward his face again. Eventually it does begin to settle down and returns to being a regular hand, but by this time, the tough question has usually been forgotten.

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RANDOM STRANGE THOUGHTS

I happen to have a small fortune. Oh yes, I got it out of a Chinese cookie. Apparently, “my principles mean more to me than money or success.” I guess that explains how I wound up a penniless loser. And to think, I had always just assumed that it was a result of my degenerate gambling.

Jesus must really be a pretty righteous dude, because if they took the day that I was tortured and crucified and started referring to it as Good Friday, you can bet I would be mighty pissed off. Seriously, I’d be like, “Good Friday, my ass! Forget about that whole forgiveness of sins business, cause all y’all can go straight to hell as far as I’m concerned!”

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RANDOM THOUGHTS FROM GOO GOBLINS

They say ants are supposed to be so strong in relation to their size, that’s why I always pick fights with them. Think About It?

They say Aunts are supposed to be so strong, no, actually I never heard that said about Aunts.

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RANDOM THOUGHTS FROM BUCKSHOT THE BANDIT

Do you ever roll out of bed and think I want today to have a theme? Well I do and today's theme was corn. I ate corn (creamed... from a can), I thought about the journey of corn (from seed to my dinner plate), and I wrote 2 songs about corn (still untitled but one involves kernals in my feces). Maybe tomorrow will bring a new theme but for today I've got corn and that's just fine by me!

Buckshot once hit Chuck Norris and when Chuck woke up, his clothes WERE out of style.

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RANDOM MISQUOTE

"I know you are but what am I?"

- sure fire response if somebody calls you a bad name (can be used repeatedly if necessary)




To learn more visit them at www.bigolefatsquirrelleaningontherockassociationofamerica.com

Hey, watch where you point that thing!

Here's one we'll call naked alien practicing the karate. Apparently he's a black belt, but clearly his form leaves something to be desired. Quite frankly, Mr. Miyagi would be appalled. Neither "wax on wax off" nor "paint the fence". If anything, it looks more like a weak attempt at "pour the juice". What an absolute disgrace. Just another example of a know it all spaceman who can't be bothered to put forth even the slightest bit of effort.

For more spaceman stuff go to www.todaysspaceman.com

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